you deserve those people, that dont care about you and will help you continue to go nowhere with your life. You deserve them because you will never open your eyes. You will never see what you have instead of trying to get something else or someone else in your case. I make mistakes but I was always there, and I shouldnt have been after all that youve done, thinking about it makes me sick, and it makes me sick even think about it but no matter how hard I try to forget it doesnt happen, I dont understand how someone could hurt someone so much and not feel bad or even realize theyre doing something wrong.. I think that its time to leave for real and move on with my life cus for my future I want more than heartache and disappointment. That night you told me that my life was not important you dont know how much that hurt, or when you said that Im just a fat disgusting slut and that youd have someone else by the morning.. and then while Im asleep youre messaging girls saying that youre single when youre not. & going out to party when I think youre asleep at home.. I hate that your parents allow you to even do that but its not their fault.. its yours. And I go and give you another chance & what do you do? You follow all the girls youve hooked up with and who youve wanted to and lie to me telling me you love me and that you want to grow old with me and that you wouldnt do this to me.. and you been doing so much more than I even know. Its like the more I do good for you the more bad you do to me. I cant even talk to anyone so I write it pathetically on here and it sucks feeling like youre shit, and ugly, and fat and like no one will ever really care for you, you been doing this for two years and I dont think you even care, it was suppose to be just me and you, but thats too easy you have to complicate it fuck I hate my life, I know that no one will really see this but I still feel like I cant even completely spill my feelings out I dont know how to cope with all this, I have no one to talk to, no one that will actually listen, and I cant write it here or on paper. I just wish you could grow up, but you cant, Im growing up and youre staying the same you think youre single and that you can do what you want when youre not.. maybe I should act the same. But no that doesnt work you do it everyday and if I even say Im gonna Im called a filthy slut, cunt, stupid bitch, etc.. and that youll be in some other girls bed I dont know what to do. I often pray and call out to the creator to help me and nothing happens but more hurtful things, if you dont even care about my life and not much other people do because you all beat me into the ground.. why am I here? I might as well just be gone and make all you happy help you out because my existence isnt worth it right? thats what youve told me